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Monday, May 14, 2012

Dear Mother...

As Mother’s Day drew near and  just becoming a new grandmother (a.k.a.Lolli)...
I pondered what would I say to my daughter who is a new momma...and other young moms. So I tried to put in words some of what is on my heart and decided to join  Amber at ‘My Mother Letter’ link up party.

Dear Mother,

Oh, there’s much in my heart…
so much I wish I could transfer directly from my heart to yours. 
But that would be too easy...it is not the way to growth…
not the way a heart is transformed.

There are so many things I would do differently…
I could name each one for you and maybe you would find some help.  
But I believe the best gift an older mom can give a younger mom is applause.

If you have ever run a marathon…or any long race…
there are people lined along the streets …clapping their hands…
giving words of encouragement…infusing hope into your tired body…
a brief distraction from the pain...instilling faith that you can finish the race.

You my sister are running your race…and I clap my hands…I cheer you on…
”you are doing a good job”…”you will make it”…
”God is faithful to meet you in every season”…
”He never fails to give the wisdom needed”…
”He has Grace for those moments when you fail”…
”Oh, and never forget…it is not about always doing it right,
but how you react when you get it wrong.”

There are times in a race where you “hit the wall”...lose sight of the finish line…
legs too tired to move…lungs no longer finding the oxygen needed...
brain yielding to fatigue.
That is when a runner needs someone to come and just put an arm around them…
walk with them a bit…give them a drink…
speak convincing words that they have enough in them to finish.

As you run through each season of life in motherhood…
here is what I would cheer as you run your race….

As you nurse those babies…wipe those bottoms…fall in bed exhausted…
just remember these days do count…you are planting…you are impacting the world…
what you are doing does matter...your life has value…
 you are a life changer and therefore, a world changer.

When you see those teenage years looming ahead…
I will encourage you like an older, wiser lady did for me. 
These don’t have to be the years where you clinch your teeth and hold your breath,
while just hoping to survive. Yes, these years can be challenging…
but oh, how special they can be…rich and deep and lovely.

My one piece of advice for these years…BE AUTHENTIC…
Teens sniff out hypocrisy like a drug-sniffing dog searching for the hidden. 
And when they find it…they go in for the kill. 
On the other hand, if they know you both are on a journey together…
both learning…both changing…both humans trying to follow after God…
they are more likely to turn their hearts towards home and not away.

As the curtain closes on your parenting act…
when every step they take leads them further from under your roof…
how a momma’s heart tears a bit as each child steps across that threshold.
As they travel out the door…release them fully into God’s love. 
Remember whenever one door closes…a new door will open. 
However, this new door needs to be opened from their direction...voluntarily.
Let them invite you into their new space…a new territory...
  where the transition begins from parent/child to brothers and sisters in Christ.
And when they marry…let them leave and cleave…and watch a new cycle begin.

Each family’s life together is a story in progress….
Each phase is a chapter in this ever unfolding tale.
As one chapter ends…in the turning of the page…a new and exciting chapter starts.
One day a beautiful story will have been written…remember, not a perfect storyline…
but like the plot found in all good books...
filled with adventure, truth, challenges, sorrow, joy and most importantly redemption.
He is the author of your family's stories…each one written uniquely by Him.
The Author is trustworthy…enjoy letting Him write your story.

Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.  
                                                                   Hebrews 12:2

My Daughter’s first Mother’s Day...pure joy!!!
Showered with love...using new lens to take pictures:)

In her own words:)

Honoring his sister and his mom:)

So richly blessed!!!

oh...so much love!!!


~seeing God’s fingerprints everywhere
~freedom that comes through  letting go
~learning you can work together even with distance between
~more looking in the rear view mirror…seeing God’s faithfulness
~decorating for my parent’s anniversary party
~all the details coming together
~sweet night of celebration
~87 yr. old parents who still danceJ
~all the kids home for the weekend
Amy and Ellie staying for a couple more days
~lots of Ellie time
~sweet words from the kids
~new camera lens
~Mother’s Day as a “lolli”
~sharing my daughter’s first Mother’s Day.
~sitting with my daughters just sharing our hearts
~son finishing his last homeschool work on Mother’s Day…Senior year completed…Yeah!!!!


  1. "it's how you react when you get it wrong." May I always remember that. You are such a blessing to me! I have learned so much about mothering and have been so encouraged by your journey ahead of me. Thanks so much!

    1. Christina...oh my friend, your words bless and humble me...my prayer is that what God redeems can bless and encourage someone else...blessings to you~

  2. Oh I need to hear that...we all do.
    I have often thought of "my cloud of witnesses" but I think I need to think of them as sheering me on...their race won, and mine still going.

    thank you for this.what a great way to start the week!

    1. T...you are running a great race...cheering you on...blessings to you~

  3. I soaked up every life-giving word...such encouragement in your words. Thanks for sharing your wisdom! How wonderful to see all the love in your family...Blessings, Ro :)

    1. Dolly...I am blessed you stopped by...thanks~

  4. Just such RICH words to my mama heart...wow, I'm so thankful for you. What a joyful Mother's Day you had, and to watch your daughter as a mother...that must be extra special! Have a wonderful week Ro, thank you for being my personal cheerleader...I CAN do this!

    1. Jacque...clapping and cheering you on...yes YOU Can DO IT!!! and sharing mother’s day with my daughter made it an extra special mother’s day:) blessings to you sweet friend~

  5. This is full of such rich, beautiful wisdom, Ro. I love it! And you are so right about teens sniffing out hypocrisy! It's a growing season for both mom and child! :) I also love the grandma name of "Lolli!" Thanks for sharing the great pics of your beautiful family as well.

    1. Beth...yes a friend gave an idea to my daughter....I am lolli...my husband pop...together we are lollipop :)....you can bet my house will be full of lollipops for all the grands:) blessings~

  6. such a touching and beautiful letter and filled with wisdom! Blessings to you and your beautiful family!

    1. alida...thanks for your kind words and i am glad you stopped by....blessings to you~

  7. Replies
    1. Thanks for stopping by....blessings~

  8. What a beautiful baby. And family. I love your philosophy to give "applause." Yea to you!

    1. lisa...she is a cutie...and Yes...woman need to encourage one another more...blessings to you~

  9. I soaked up every word of this letter... jotted several lines in my journal and ached already at the idea of letting go --- but YES, I agree- we can trust the Story writer. His tales are far better than our grandest dreams. Your family is beautiful. I can tell you sowed seeds of love- they shine with the beauty of being loved and treasured. Happy Mother's Day to you!

    1. Alicia...blessed that you found words here...and thank you for your kindness...glad you dropped in...have a blessed day~

  10. This truly blessed me, thanks.

    1. Thank-you Denise...blessings to you~

  11. Oh so beautiful. Your family, the love... beautiful. You are blessed with such an amazing family. So many gifts. So many gifts.

    1. Jennifer...thanks for dropping by...yes so many gifts...so very thankful~

  12. So many nuggets of wisdom here. I appreciate them so much! Your letter is beautiful!

    1. Thank you theresa...blessings to you~

  13. Ells this was beautiful. Thank you for the advice. Too many times I think I'm a bad mom. However, I'm learning, just like they are.

    1. Michelle...oh how the enemy wants to tell us all that we are the worst mother...but we each are the perfect mom for our kids...not because we act perfect...but because we are given each one...so we are perfect for them...blessing to you as you mother well~

  14. Such a beautiful family. And such wisdom here. I will always remember this: the best gift to give a new mother is applause. This is the root of kindness. Isn't that what we all needed, back then? Happy belated mother's day, my friend. I can see how loved you are.

  15. Dear Ro,
    I am so late to get here to comment, but I wanted to be sure to tell you how much I love this post. I love all of it, but you advice to BE AUTHENTIC is so profoundly right on! The beauty of the love in your family's pictures is evidence that young mothers can trust your wisdom!